“Enjoyed the sunset tonight on a boat, drinking wine out of a Nalgene bottle and eating beef jerky.”

“im still not 100% on how twitter works… but i will continually update for no apparent reason.”

“The Internet, the most democratic of all media, may prove once and for all that democracy is stupid.”

“Cosmetology exams at the Ramada. Well-dressed people are carrying around disembodied mannequin heads with well-styled hair”

the weather outside makes me want to go camping and hang out all day in a tent

too much toothpaste foaming mess, phone rings, I feel like im in a kids in the hall skit, as I try to talk on the phone while foaming drool